Death Notices

Remains of the late Eggs Blog will be removed this evening to glenbeigh church.
Bring your boots.

Fr. Smelly.

Saucepans

Look at them sitting by the sink unclean
like Paddy Darky returning from a hard days work in Shneem
I wish I could get up and wash those pots
But my penis is still stuck in Naomi Watts

"Oh Peader where are you, I need you now"
screamed Patsy McDans favourite cow
as they stunned it and hung it and sliced it and diced it
and Jim Diggin ate it in Buntys slough

Now along came Timmy Tucker with a slice of Killorglin
He tried to open up a Beanbag factory and sell it to morgan
But twas all in vein for this man from the village
so he went to caherciveen for some rape and pillage.

Johnny Hates Jazz.

Glenbeigh man transforms into dragon in local

Locals in glenbeigh were shocked on saturday night when local man Brian Ted transformed into some sort of dragon type creature. .The footage above was shot by acclaimed Reuters camera man Jack the Rat. "Jesus Chrisht we havent seen nutin like dis since cowboys public display of affection with that Yeti ha?" screamed widely loved local Brian Looney. Local parish priest Father Idontknowhisname has denied rumours that Brian Ted will be employed as a bunsen burner in scientific experiments to be carried out on gene macs left testicle. Bring your boots & refreshments will be provided in the community centre post haste.

Jegg reporting for Radio na Latvia.
(ignoring the fact that I managed to provide video footage in a radio report)

who would you rather shag?

Andra Corr or Dana?
Nicole Kidman or Mary Harney?
Ricki Lake or Britney spears?
Tina Turner or Kate Winslett?
Puff daddy or puff mummy?

Hope it fuckin kills you - you murdering bastard

Yes Ireland attempted to assasinate American President George Bush last week by giving him a rare bunch of poisionous shamrock. Irish diplomats were heard say at the presentation " ha ha he's in for it now" and " Id love to shag Donald Rumsfeld.". Bush a murderous insane monkey like creature arrived at the presentation without any trousers forgetting to put them on on before leaving the oval office. American advisors to the President meet daily to explain the concept of the oval shape to the President but now just call it "the round office" for the sake of simplicity.

Protestors say no to american move

The quaint seaside village of Glenbeigh was at the centre of a politicial storm this week over plans to move the entire village as well as parts of Glencar to New York.

Over 8 million residents from the ' Glenbeigh againts yanks (GAY) group stormed the local Post office.

Manager Tony Mac was tied up for three hours while members of the group sang songs such as 'no to Willy Wonka whitewash' and U2's 'Where the streets have no name'.

A shell shcoked Tony said " Do you want a stamp?' while his American wife Pat took off in a hot air balloon and was last seen on the outskirts of Tubbercurry.

Spokesman for GAY Peader O Sullivan said " People around here like Ireland. We've always felt a close tie with Ireland but not so much Iceland. Sure its pretty and white with geezers and polar bears but do they have bands like West Life and the Corrs? do they hell."

A picture of local politician Jackie Healy Rae was burned by the mob while eggs were thrown at Falveys caravan park. Owner john Falvey refused to comment except for saying " does anyone want an omlette?"

GAY Chairman Stephen Cabbage is expected to address the crowd later today in the village center. Music provided by the Valentia pipe band. Bring boots.

Graham Egg, Sky News, Glenbeigh




POETRY CORNER WITH SEAN EGG!



Wednesday, March 7, 2007
On the Road from Killorglin to Caherciveen
On the road from Killorglin to Caherciveen by Dennis Martin McCarthy (composed by Jim Diggin.)

As i stepped out from francey sheahans one morning so fair,
i bumped into maureen darky and her locks of red hair,
she broke into verse with a thrust of her chest,
and shattered the windows of paddy brennans passing herse.

and now we go westward to a place called caragh lake,
where ferghal O' Brien pumps his iron all day,
kerry's bog village is a place to behold,
while a drunk cookoo tries to find his way home.

and now we're in Glenbeigh the loveliest of them all,
with all of its characters lined up to entrall,
from the gour, johnny mahony to waxy and peadar,
and brendan sweeney thrown to add a bit of swagger.

the towers on a saturday is like milltown mart,
with all the local farmers leaving off a couple of farts,
from drinking bad guinness and eating in breens,
tis a wonder we all have any spleens.

so to all a farewell and with this i do leave,
for what else do i say only 'up ballycleave',
for if Glenbeigh is now a part of the USA,
then fuck it John Egg, you must be Gay.

Bbbbblllllllaaaaaaaaattttttttttttttt

Sean Egg

Posted by Pete (bigfoot) Din Dan at 10:41 PM 0 comments

Cathal egg

Fair dues to Cathal but I thought that was a decent song. Freddie should be up for a bafta nomination in my opinion. Did he really run someone over? graham egg

Cathal egg

Fair dues to Cathal but I thought that was a decent song. Freddie should be up for a bafta nomination in my opinion. Did he really run someone over?

Recognise the shopkeeper in this film?

Watch with sound on!

Bbbbllllaattt

sorry egg,

shuzzzz

Yikes, havent we become all special and shit with this blog. someone was really bored at work one day i see. Graham looks like i will be making your wedding after all, sorry about that. Do we really have to give to oxfam or can we just donate directly to mike. where and when is your stag?. John i got tickets for the waterboys but i didnt get yee any, you can get them on the website any hew. Mike your not allowed go. We've all agreed on that. Why sean do you have a seperate blog page?. Had sean mc into to the hotel the other day, hes a evil bastard, even the kids here could sense it. Dinny rasher hows the family thing going for you these days?. later losers. The sacred one.

Glenbeigh heads off for the States

Glenbeigh this morning set off for New York after an invitation to join the United States by G.W. Bush. The invite was sent to Jimmy Michaeleen 20 years ago, (despite bush not being president at the time) but laid in his bedside locker along with his collection of 'Buns n Guns monthly' mags. Denis Martin provided tea and sandwiches as all the locals joined in for the big push. Sean ted got things off to a flying start by digging a rather big drain all around the glenbeigh border. Then it was over to Pete McDan and his tractor to wedge it all free. We wish them all well on their journey. Refreshments will be provided in the community centre afterwards.